July 31, 2012

Never Once...

This is one of the times of year that I always look back at the blessings GOD has given my family, and I feel a sense of peace that HIS hand has been on us the whole time. Why? Because 9 years ago my husband and oldest son were in a jet-ski accident that rocked our world and changed everything for us. This past week in worship we sang a Matt Redman song, Never Once, and it just spoke to me not only about how GOD was with us through that accident, but how HE has been with us (me) through everything! My mind was just filled with instances and circumstances that I knew GOD carried me through. As I sang this song in worship to my KING, I thanked HIM for never once leaving me on my own. My story is not yours. Some of these may seem  trivial to you, but they are vital to who I am today and what GOD has done for me. These are just snippets of the things that were going through my mind as I sang in worship:

Standing on this mountaintop
2012: I have been blessed with 16 years of marriage to my best friend, and I have  4 beautiful children!!
Looking just how far we’ve come
2012:Nineteen years ago we met and began our journey
Knowing that for every step
YOU were with us
1996: I was blessed to marry my high school sweetheart and best friend. GOD carried us through a 2 1/2 year dating period where we were separated but learned about each other through our letters and phone calls.
1998: We found out we were pregnant with our first baby! We bought our first house! I graduated from college!!
1999: We found out we were pregnant with our second baby!
1999: We found out we were pregnant with our third baby!
2001: We found out we were pregnant with our fourth baby!!
2008: We found out we were pregnant with our fifth baby!!! We bought our second house!

Kneeling on this battle ground
1993: My family moved to Carthage, TX during the middle of my senior year.
Seeing just how much You’ve done
1993:I met Ben the first day of school
Knowing every victory
Was Your power in us

Scars and struggles on the way
1984: We moved out of the  house I had grown up in. My parents told us they were getting a divorce. Nothing in my life would ever be the same.
1999: At the 8 week sonogram with our second baby we were told there wasn't a heartbeat where there should be one.
2000: I was put in the hospital with polyhydramnios when I was 26 weeks pregnant with our second child (third pregnancy). The doctors told us he may not live.
2003: Ben and Cole were in a terrible jet-ski accident. I had to fly in the helicopter with Cole while Ben was life-flighted in a separate helicopter.
But with joy our hearts can say
Yes, our hearts can say
Never once did we ever walk alone
2003: Sitting in the hospital with my 4 year old son the night of his accident he asked to pray with me. He prayed to GOD, "Thank YOU for protecting  me and my dad on the jet-ski today". He then told me that he knew he and his daddy were alive because JESUS was riding on the jet ski with them! Tears of joy flooded my face as I held my little boy and thanked JESUS for a child with such a pure heart.

Never once did You leave us on our own

2003: When Ben woke up from his coma he was able to correctly describe the ICU room he had been in (but had not been awake in). He said he saw JESUS sitting on the counter across from him.....what he described seeing was more like fire....no distinguishable face, but he knew he had not been alone.

You are faithful, God, You are faithful

Kneeling on this battle ground
2000: Ben had to learn what it was like to be a single dad for 6 weeks while I was in the hospital in another state. I was only able to see my family on Friday-Sun.
Seeing just how much You’ve done
2000: The time I spent in the hospital brought me closer to GOD and renewed my faith in HIS goodness.

Knowing every victory

Was Your power in us
2000: Our second son was born 7 weeks early weighing in at a healthy 6 lbs 7 oz! The doctors were amazed!!! The doctors did numerous tests to find something--anything--wrong with him and they never could!

2003: The doctors initially thought Cole had a broken jaw and injury to his brain after the jet-ski accident. He simply had a cut on his right check that only required a butterfly bandage. (That and a bad headache!)

2003: Ben sustained a closed head injury from the accident. The doctors didn't know the outcome, but worst case scenario would be that he wouldn't be able to speak, take care of himself, or work again. Within 4 months Ben was back to "normal"! :)

Scars and struggles on the way
2008: We had 30 days to move out of the rent house we had been living in. We had nowhere to go.

2009: I found out I had anti-bodies in my blood that would fight against my baby I was carrying.
2009-2010: I lost my job, we lost income, and we eventually lost our house.

But with joy our hearts can say
2008: Our pastor and his wife graciously allowed us to move into their basement while we looked for a house.

Never once did we ever walk alone
Carried by Your constant grace
2009: The antibodies I was carrying caused our baby to be born jaundiced, and he needed a blood transfusion and blood exchange. After 1 week in NICU he was able to come home!!!

Held within Your perfect peace
2000: Sitting beside my son in the  NICU after he was born 7 weeks early, I knew that GOD gave him to us for a reason and would carry us through.
2003: Sitting beside my husband in the ICU I knew GOD was in control and had HIS hand on the situation.
2009: Sitting beside my son in the NICU I felt a peace about his health.

Never once, no, we never walk alone
2010: GOD had a place for us to move  

Every step we are breathing in Your grace
We have always been blessed with work. GOD has always provided for our financial needs to be met.
Our family has always been blessed with health.
GOD has given us so many opportunities to worship HIM and share HIM with  others...in and out of the church building.

Evermore we’ll be breathing out Your praise
GOD has been so amazing to show HIMSELF to us in so many situations.
I have the opportunity to share GOD with my children as I raise them in this ungodly world.
I have been given the opportunity to show GOD to my students every day that I have them in my classroom.

You are faithful, God, You are faithful

You are faithful, God, You are faithful

I pray that I am faithful in speaking out to others about my GOD and HIS love for them. I want to be able to use the stories I have, the lessons I have learned, and the fire GOD has put us in to show others that, like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, you can go through the fire, but you don't have to come out smelling like smoke. 
Daniel 3:26-27 "Nebuchadnezzar then approached the opening of the blazing furnace and shouted, “Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, servants of the Most High God, come out! Come here!”
So Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego came out of the fire, and the satraps, prefects, governors and royal advisers crowded around them. They saw that the fire had not harmed their bodies, nor was a hair of their heads singed; their robes were not scorched, and there was no smell of fire on them.

I pray that I am never silent, but am ever diligent in being salt and light in this world.


Janette said...

You always write so beautifully. Thanks for sharing your journey. :)

Mike said...

Amen and Amen...........memories of all those things I had hidden away so I wouldn't feel them too often came flooding back. But I do praise the LORD of all He has done to protect my children, to walk through the "Fire Swamp" with them, and to hold them close as a Daddy should.