Dad, can we use the water yet????

When we got home at about 9:00 Thursday night from my son Cole's violin recital I heard what I thought was water running. I asked Ben if he was washing clothes, but Annalisa, my 3 year old genius, informed me very promptly that it was the dishwasher running not the washing machine. Well, I looked at the dishwasher and sure enough the lights were on, so I thought, "Wow! She is really smart." But it still sounded weird to me and I just chalked it up to the fact that I hardly ever actually HEAR the dishwasher run since I try to do that while I am asleep. (there isn't a warning attached to dishwashers that says, "do not operate while sleeping" as there is to hairdryers. I had to quit drying my hair in bed when I saw that warning!) So the night progressed and at about 11:30 Ben asked me if I was washing clothes. That question concerned me mildly, and I explained to him that Annalisa had pointed out to me it was the dishwasher, but we both realized very quickly that the dishwasher was no longer running, yet water was....somewhere. So, Ben put on his shoes and went under the house only to find water spraying everywhere and standing water under there also. Not good news. He turned the water off for the night and would call a plumber in the morning. Well, apparantly everyone within a 100 mile radius had the same problem because no plumber could make it out to our house before 6:30 p.m.! Ben had been going next door filling up a gallon jug to put in the back of the commode so we could flush. In case you wondered, it takes 3 gallons to fill up the tank. At 7:00 still no plumber. 7:30 Ben calls and asks about the plumber and the secretary tells us he is at our house. We are like, "Really? We can't see him. Is he invisible?" So, she says she will call us right back. 8:00 still no plumber and no phone call. Wow! This is getting to be a fun evening!! About 8:20 the plumber shows up and informs us that he can't do anything tonight because it is ....get this....too dark! Woah! But, we were wondering if he had been there when he was supposed to be could he have fixed it then? He charged us $130 for going under the house and putting some tape on the pipe to "hopefully hold it until tomorrow"... that sounds promising, right? My boys are excited because this is 2 nights without a bath! On Saturday the plumber calls back and says that he can come fix the leak but because of his licensing he will have to replace ALL the pipes under our house. WHAT? Ben told him to forget it, and he is in there now replacing the one pipe that had the leak, my kids are running around with dirty feet and hands and I am wondering when I can shave my legs!